After laying around the house for a bit and chatting with Lara, I went for a run with the girls.
It was drizzling outside. Not raining, drizzling.
Off and on there had been thunder, but we weren't expecting too much when we went out.
We ran up through the hills, then turned around and headed for the park.
We entered the park, and I told the girls I was going to run ahead.
Just as I said that, it began to pour while I ran through a row of trees and park benches, (where a couple was kissing), other runners were passing me, car lights were twinkling in the distance (on the roads that circle the park), leaves were falling from the trees, and this song came on.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RIZdjT1472Y
At this point I was already panting from running so far, and starting to run so hard. Rain was pouring on my face, and I couldn't tell if I was sweating, crying, or both.
It was probably one of the most amazing experiences of my life. I haven't felt that free in so long. I haven't felt truly present in months.
So many changes have happened over the past 2 years, and I've never known how to deal with it. Never had a chance to fully get out how I felt, so I just could get back to being ME.
It was probably one of the most amazing experiences of my life. I haven't felt that free in so long. I haven't felt truly present in months.
So many changes have happened over the past 2 years, and I've never known how to deal with it. Never had a chance to fully get out how I felt, so I just could get back to being ME.
And then this song came on. On shuffle, on my ipod. And changed everything.
I kept it on replay, and just kept running as hard as I could. My adrenaline rush kicked in, and I literally felt like I was sprinting toward finally having a clear mind. Tears streaming down my face, rain pounding against me.
After we all finished running around the park, we met on the grass and started to head back home, with rain still pouring on our faces.
The thunder and lightening intensified, and it began to pour even harded. We all just smiled and ran through the rain, this song still playing in my ears as thunder boomed in the background and lightening flashed around us. People cheered us on, and at this point our clothes were so wet, that nothing mattered.
I finished the night with a great talk with a friend, accompanied with some stress-relieving nutella, crackers, and chocolate.
So like I said, today was beautiful.
Exhausting, but beautiful.
So as cliche as it sounds, if you're looking for something, or want something, don't just sit around and wait, but don't overthink the interactions that come your way (expecting an epiphany or a change at any moment).
Just LIVE. Just do it. Even if you don't know why you should be doing something, or if you feel like you're caught up in societal norms, just do what you want, even if it feels crazy, even if you feel tired, even if NO ONE else wants to do it with you.
Just try to find you. Try to find what makes you happy. If you don't know what any of those things are, just do as many things are you can until, one day, something hits you. I hope this happens for you, and I hope it overwhelms you to the point where you're so weak you can hardly breathe by how beautiful that answer actually is.
I kept it on replay, and just kept running as hard as I could. My adrenaline rush kicked in, and I literally felt like I was sprinting toward finally having a clear mind. Tears streaming down my face, rain pounding against me.
After we all finished running around the park, we met on the grass and started to head back home, with rain still pouring on our faces.
The thunder and lightening intensified, and it began to pour even harded. We all just smiled and ran through the rain, this song still playing in my ears as thunder boomed in the background and lightening flashed around us. People cheered us on, and at this point our clothes were so wet, that nothing mattered.
I finished the night with a great talk with a friend, accompanied with some stress-relieving nutella, crackers, and chocolate.
So like I said, today was beautiful.
Exhausting, but beautiful.
So as cliche as it sounds, if you're looking for something, or want something, don't just sit around and wait, but don't overthink the interactions that come your way (expecting an epiphany or a change at any moment).
Just LIVE. Just do it. Even if you don't know why you should be doing something, or if you feel like you're caught up in societal norms, just do what you want, even if it feels crazy, even if you feel tired, even if NO ONE else wants to do it with you.
Just try to find you. Try to find what makes you happy. If you don't know what any of those things are, just do as many things are you can until, one day, something hits you. I hope this happens for you, and I hope it overwhelms you to the point where you're so weak you can hardly breathe by how beautiful that answer actually is.
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