I think I learned a way to sum up the way I've been feeling lately: disrupted.
My friend Adena talked about the importance of feeling at peace and okay with everything in your life. And sometimes that peace gets disrupted. I realized that I did have peace when I left Italy and that I was feeling disrupted since I arrived.
However, just talking about the idea of being "disrupted" with someone, helped me get to a point where I feel less disrupted. I'm starting to come to peace with the idea that sometimes you won't be completely at peace. And just being able to stay that it's okay to not always have everything together.... just makes you kind of get back to being at peace.
I've been taking more photos when I walk around campus. I've been surrounding myself more with people who accept the changes I've made in the past 6 months. I've taken some time to do what I want and need, versus feeling pressured to make up for all of the lost time I had with people. And I'm feeling better.
Granted, there will be waves. But those waves are so beautiful. I used to loathe waves.
Imagine yourself standing in the water at the beach. If you try to fight the current, if you try to reject the tide, it takes so much effort just to keep yourself in the same exact place. But if you lay back in the water, spread your fingers, and tilt your head back, and just let the water take you, it'll be a lot easier. Sure you don't know where you're going. But at least along the way, you're relaxed, enjoying the feel of the water, the view of the sky, and the smell of the salty sea air.
My friend Adena talked about the importance of feeling at peace and okay with everything in your life. And sometimes that peace gets disrupted. I realized that I did have peace when I left Italy and that I was feeling disrupted since I arrived.
However, just talking about the idea of being "disrupted" with someone, helped me get to a point where I feel less disrupted. I'm starting to come to peace with the idea that sometimes you won't be completely at peace. And just being able to stay that it's okay to not always have everything together.... just makes you kind of get back to being at peace.
I've been taking more photos when I walk around campus. I've been surrounding myself more with people who accept the changes I've made in the past 6 months. I've taken some time to do what I want and need, versus feeling pressured to make up for all of the lost time I had with people. And I'm feeling better.
Granted, there will be waves. But those waves are so beautiful. I used to loathe waves.
Imagine yourself standing in the water at the beach. If you try to fight the current, if you try to reject the tide, it takes so much effort just to keep yourself in the same exact place. But if you lay back in the water, spread your fingers, and tilt your head back, and just let the water take you, it'll be a lot easier. Sure you don't know where you're going. But at least along the way, you're relaxed, enjoying the feel of the water, the view of the sky, and the smell of the salty sea air.
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