Spaces

**note, this post is just about spaces, and what YOU can do to make others feel comfortable. this post does not acknowledge the many layers of complexities that go into people's ability to access, or live within, said spaces. and it definitely does not acknowledge global dynamics. 

I value cultivating spaces in which myself, and others, feel comfortable, open, and able to explore interests, discussions, and who they are. 

Personal internal dialogue and interest exploration -- and expression -- is often stigmatized as a private entity within the United States; public or open declaration of our struggles, curiosities, or desires is unwarranted unless it fits certain criteria on how it's delivered, what the content is, and who the audience is. Pursuing vulnerability, or raw and wounded desires, is not easily welcomed by the masses, and it's especially not welcomed on social media (excluding sites like tumblr, which thankfully encourage and accept a sense of anonymity to people's profiles, due to our society's general void of spaces that allow for intimate communities and dialogues of self-expression). 

To many, there is obviously an ever-so-delicate line between "over-sharing" and voicing something that needs to be unleashed, but just because someone says something deep, unusual, or profound, DOES NOT mean it's over-sharing. 

Over-sharing is not only relative to every individual, but it is -- in part -- caused by our society's suppression of those gnawing or blooming thoughts that creep up within us every day. 

The ones you act on, or don't act on. 
The ones that paralyze you, or ignite you. 
The ones you wish you could just shout, or proclaim as soon as they arise. 

We've all had these thoughts at least once in our lives: 
To deny this, means to accept one's self-cementing in our society's fear of confrontation and the act of feeling.

I'm not happy. 
I am happy.
I really need someone to talk to. 
I LIKE YOU. 
That made me cry/tear up/sad/angry/happy.
We should kiss. 
I deserve better.
You deserve better. 
I know we just met, but you're wicked (or insert other desired adjective) cool and I know we hardly know each other, but we should be friends. 
I NEED (LOVE, A HUG, FOOD, ADVENTURE, YOU)
This isn't what I want my life to be like. 
THIS IS EVERYTHING I'VE EVER WANTED. 
I want to change. 
LISTEN. 
I feel like I've known you for years.
I miss you. 
Woah, you're attractive.
I am okay. 
I AM _______.
I AM NOT ________. 

We NEED more spaces and resources that support a sense of COMFORT, a sense of OKAY; a reassurance that all that we feel, think, believe, want to say, don't say, actually say, and desire is OKAY. 

We all have these long internal checklists of 

how we're supposed to present ourselves, 
what we're supposed to pursue, 
how we're supposed to engage with others, and 
what we're supposed to say; 
these things are limiting and restrict many people's happiness, openness, and curiosity. 

And yet, despite wanting to say, feel, obtain, or shout something so badly, the majority quietly continues on with these stifling patterns, habits, and expectations. We continue with fear of expression and confrontation and thus let moments greet us and leave us without making the most of that exact moment, because we were too scared to mold or contort societal norms. 

And to that, I say: 
Disclaimer: sass is about to be unleashed.

BULLSHIT. Everyone has their personal battles, some are obviously worse than others. But to whoever is reading this, take a quick moment to think of a time and setting where you wish it would have been more "socially acceptable," to say, feel, or do something in particular. What did people do in order to create an environment where you felt UNCOMFORTABLE with just being you? 
Now, take another moment to check yourself (before you wreck yourself), and wonder if you have ever made another person feel that level of discomfort that you previously experienced. (I'm not asking you to feel terrible, I'm just asking you to be aware). What could you have done differently to allow that person to feel more OKAY with who they are? We are all trying to live, pursue our dreams, and be okay in a complex and hypocritical, yet dynamic and beautiful society. 
SO PLEASE, do not be an ass and TAMPER with someone's inner strength, or with someone's effort to try and live their life to the best of their ability. AND ON TOP OF THAT, make the effort to create a space in which THEY FEEL more comfortable while being in your presence. 

You will feel better, and they will feel better. 
It's not the answer to all of our problems, but hell... it's a small step toward a much needed revolution of consciousness and defining of norms. 

Happy Monday errbody, and be kind to your neighbor and yourself. 

Shape

Never be afraid of the world's ability to shape you, and never doubt your capacity to shape the world. 

In an individualistic and capitalist society, we place to much emphasis on the individual. Of course being an individual is so incredibly important; every person needs to be aware of their worth and all of their lovely qualities. 

However, coming from someone who works alone in the woods and lives in a tiny town, a sense of community, and human interaction is necessary (at least for me) to live a fulfilling and blooming life. 

Living and working alone has helped shed light on how much a simple interaction with a complete stranger can, dare I say, change your life and also theirs. Traveling made me incredibly open to meeting new people, and how others can teach you so much about yourself and the world. But, hypocritically, I feel like I'm more hesitant to be open with people in the US. Maybe it's because our culture is so individualized, that sometimes I feel like I can't always fearlessly approach others like I do when I'm traveling? 
Anyway, experiencing isolation has instilled in me, quite a bit more courage, to get to know, and learn from, others. I've stopped caring so much about whether or not people think I'm weird for being social and friendly.

And as odd as it may sound, I've found that if you truly want everyone you encounter to be happy and to feel loved, they will pick up on that vibe from you, and will be even more open to talking with you; they will be more likely to return the feeling of love and happiness. 

If you walk out your door, each morning, with this vibe and with these positive intentions for yourself and the rest of the world -- your simple loving-kindness will change someone's day, and in turn they will be more likely to be open with you and CHANGE YOUR DAY. Idealistically, I believe that almost everyone is secretly seeking a feeling of being interconnected. We all are wrapped up in our iPhones and social networks, which only provide a cover-up for our desire of social interaction. And since we're so used to hiding behind the letters of a keyboard, we're too scared and paralyzed by societal norms to take the first step in interacting with a stranger. 

So, take a moment, and indulge in the feeling of love and kindness; wish that others feel loved and accepted. And then, make the first move in getting to know someone. Let's increase the level of reciprocal grace and circular flow in our lives. 

While you're at it, listen to these kickin' tunes; they'll put a pep in your step and will make you want to take on, and shape, the world that I, you, and we, live in... I promise. 

http://www.colbertnation.com/lake-street-dive

INSPIRE

Yes. 

YES.



and, oh....

YESSS!!!!!! 

That is all. Happy reading loves.  

http://thoughtcatalog.com/stephanie-althoff/2014/02/you-should-fall-in-love-with-someone-who-inspires-you/#YZ7bugwFhvvKV7Uh.01

Brink

I love when a series of reaffirming events occur; moments that all solidify the same particular belief, hope, or action. 

I feel like I'm on the brink of something exquisite right now. Granted, it has taken much practice and patience to get to this point, and will require even more in the future, but it's still a long-lost feeling that I've been missing and craving. 

This morning I was able to successfully meditate for the first time in months. When I say successful, I don't necessarily mean that I came out of my meditation session with all of my problems answered and a completely clear mind. By successful, I mean that I was able to embrace and endure raw, intense, and deep emotions without running away from them. That was such an incredible feeling -- to know that I'm progressing in my ability to love myself again.

Throughout the past few weeks, so many resources have been coming my way that have been helped me gather up tools to improve how I view myself. 

I'm always so kind, open, and loving with others, and I feel like one of my biggest challenges is treating myself just how I treat others. When I am at peace with myself though, I notice that my ability to transcend love is of course much, much stronger. 

I want to feel the love I give to others, and then intensify the level of love I feel and give to others. 

Everyone deserves to feel loved and accepted. I love making people feel this way -- we have enough things in society that makes us doubt ourselves, so why would anyone choose to behave in such a way that makes others feel so bad about themselves, if WE ALL KNOW that almost all of us are having enough internal battles as it is!?! But with that said, I also need to make myself feel this way, not just others. 

To make myself self-love though, I need to confront the things I've been trying to avoid. I read a few quotes today that sum it up so nicely, and I'm honestly so excited to be in a good place again:

"By becoming intimate with how we close down and how we open up, we awaken our unlimited potential." 

"Unconditional good heart toward others is not even a possibility unless we attend to our own [problems]. Everything we encounter thus becomes an opportunity for practicing loving-kindness." 

Realms

Being swept in swirling, consuming, and effervescent warmth; the thought alone quenches my thirst for company and adventure. 

I am both calmed and ignited by the thought of the archaic, and the perpetuity of modernity; the juxtapositions, the melting, the commingling of it all. Spaces that allow contradictions to grind, evolve, and persist will always steal and reaffirm my heart. Spaces that allow opposites to just be, will always provide comfort. Coexisting, in any form, is a type of existence that is under-pursued and underrated. 

I will always be weak at the knees at the thought of, or encountering of, a place that transgresses the normal, and allows me to transgress the normal. 

I dream of resuscitating behaviors, habits, and charisma that are unleashed in these places. My mind becomes encapsulated by expectations, customs, and  my location. A lack of warm, a lack of clash, a lack of melding can nourish an environment that pulls me into "the uncomfortably comfortable."  

The uncomfortably comfortable is the realm of bitterly habitual cycles and old patterns. I want to simply live in the comfortably uncomfortable; the realm of the invigorating unknown and undiscovered new. 

I want to revivify my life, reinstate the comfortably uncomfortable. 

I don't want to exist as or portray the identity I have within the uncomfortably comfortable. 

Finding the power to do so can be simple and yet incredibly difficult; one must confront fears, accept awkward moments, dance with alienation, and acquire courage. 

For 2014, I hope to unearth the skills I know I have, but have hesitantly buried.